Halfway up the Stairs

Time is a flying!

2009-11-09T12:50:00.000-08:00

Just a quick "Hello" to the few that occasionally get on my blog to see if I have written anything for awhile. This semester is going super fast, I am already into my 11th week with just enough more weeks to count on one hand. I am in a very time and mind consuming class this second half of the semeste; critical care. I have been enjoying this class and it seems to really help me put everything together that I have learned thus far. There is no room for mistakes in the medical field, but I have to be at the top of my game especially with patients in critical condition.

Other than that I had a great weekend with Sam. We went out to visit the Fort Wayne boys and hang out for the weekend. It was relaxing and it helped me recharge. Plus the fact that the weekend was gorgeous and we got lots of fresh air helped it all too. My arm is a bit sore from all of the football, raquetball, and 5 gallon empty water container throwing that happened over the weekend from being with 3 guys and no girls but myself around. It was a good time.

Hope everyone is doing well! Talk to you again in a month or two!

Jack not name! Jack job!

2009-09-04T13:48:00.000-07:00

Does anyone remember the muppet movie where fozzie and kermit hit the road and they stop at a car dealership to buy a car and that huge beast of a muppet starts moving cars around with his hands? "Jack not name! Jack job!" Yeah, I was thinking about that today, no real significance, i just want to watch that movie again. Maybe feel like a kid excited to just watch muppets having fun.

Anyways, schools back in session as some of you read from Sams blog. My sanity will be tested again as usual this semester. I will get to finish my practicum this next 8 weeks with preceptor for 120 hours at the new St. E's hospital in Boardman so I am looking forward to that. I am not looking forward to the 3 hour seminar I have to give in November on accountability and peer review though. I don't know what to fill 3 hours of a seminar about accountability on. Any ideas on discussion, games, etc to fill that time up? Haha, Im studying up on it now, it should all work out just fine I'm sure. I finished my portfolio and resume this week before I get into the big clinical days and stressfilled study time. That is a big weight off of my shoulders. Its not hard work, just time consuming when I don't really have that time to give. I'm excited that this is my last year of school, it is going to go so fast and I am looking forward to all of the prospective jobs out there that I will be able to look at and decide on. Exciting and scary!

Welp, thats about it for me right now, more later as the semester goes on, hopefully I can get on this blog more than every 2 months:) Love and Peace to all!

Simply Said

2009-06-16T19:25:00.000-07:00

"You may not be her first, her last, or her only. She loved before she may love again. But if she loves you now, what else matters? She’s not perfect - you aren’t either, and the two of you may never be perfect together but if she can make you laugh, cause you to think twice, and admit to being human and making mistakes, hold onto her and give her the most you can. She may not be thinking about you every second of the day, but she will give you a part of her that she knows you can break - her heart. So don’t hurt her, don’t change her, don’t analyze and don’t expect more than she can give. Smile when she makes you happy, let her know when she makes you mad, and miss her when she’s not there." -Bob Marley

Time Away

2009-05-19T06:07:00.000-07:00

So, I have been away from the blogger scene for awhile now. As the end of the college semester reared its ugly head I resigned to focusing on it. I also started a new job that has been quite the challenge to get used to; with its crazy hours and physical stress on my body. I have found new muscles and aches and pains in my body that I never had before. I have found that I have new smells to experience that I don't quite enjoy so much. I have so many funny stories of things that happen at night with the resident that I take care of. The lady that told me that she was going to call the police on me because I was taking her out of the building even though I was only taking her down the hall. The man that told me I was the sherriff and putting him in jail. The woman who got picked up in a red firebird on Easter morning by her pimp boyfriend in his canary yellow suit and white patent leather shoes. The stories keep happening and I keep laughing. Thats all I really need in this crazy time of readjustment. A good laugh.

But now that summmer is here it is time to wind up again; to enjoy the time that I have to myself and with my family and friends. I was in a wedding with one of my best friends in the world a few weeks ago, to see her and her new husbands excitement and love was such an encouragement and a blessing. I get to enjoy seeing my friends more who live only 4 hours away, but that distance is longer than it ever should be. I get to be with my husband more and go hiking and enjoy uninterrupted time and focus on him and our house. I get to go traveling, go to concerts, read some great books, make some tasty meals, all of this I am just utterly excited to do. No stress and no time management with school involved. All free of burden. I love summer!

Done with that

2009-03-17T12:51:00.000-07:00

I can't be further from done with that past blog or the season that it fell into. I really wish that people did not have to get so uptight or judgemental over feelings that I, personally, have. So what if I wanted to write about what I just went through or the fact that I was hurt and saddened by the events in my own life. Goodness knows this blog doesn't reflect exactly who I am or my traits or flaws. This blog to me is merely a reflection of what is going on in my life and my thoughts from time to time. My friends know that, and they come to me if they have something to say from these words that I write out and post on the world wide web. I want to be able to show my cards and explain to you if you have a problem or offense.

Why would someone put themselves out there and say some really nasty things to me that are only trying to bring me down without having any contact or want to contact me? What makes a person do that? I'm not sure. If someone takes offense to what I say they should come to me straight away and find out about me before making judgement calls. Life works that way. You don't shy away from confrontation if it is needed to resolve things. Yeah, whoever it was that said some things on my past blog; it hurt, it really sucked. So good for them! I'd like to know if they feel really proud now because I never got to respond to their comments.

It is my personal belief that people should never make others look bad just to make themself look good. Life and people are too good, time is too precious, and friends are too few to be hurting each other.

Suprise Ending

2009-01-27T14:04:00.000-08:00

As many of you have heared, I lost my job at the Encore Cafe last week. It was a sudden shock, to say the least. I knew that since the cafe opened it was always hurting financially. It seems that a new cafe in Columbiana is just not what people are able to spend their hard earned money on. The past 2 months the daily take at the cafe went down to half of what it had been.

I understood that; we made drastic changes, but nothing seemed to do the trick. I knew it was hurting. Even though the head cheese never really gave me any indication of where things were, I knew we were hurting bad. I tried to do everything that I could to make things work. I developed recipes that were cheaper for the cafe but also gave some tasty scratch recipes, took care of jobs that would let people get out of there earlier on their shifts, any thing that I could think up, I did. I had a pretty strong suspicion.

My plans were to quit after this semester at college. To work through the semester and find something in the medical field to get my foot in the door since I will be graduating in May of 2010. I knew that I didn't have to put up with the place too much longer. My heart wasn't in it anymore. I never really had control over the place and it was slowly released from me over the past year anyways. Why was I there trying to make good of something that really didn't treat me right in the first place? Lots of promises were made, none of which happened. Ideas were thrown around only to be taken back at the last second. Trust was placed in me and things asked of me, but when I went to take care of them my toes (and trust) were stepped on.

I am glad to not be there anymore for the fact that I never had a worse boss, I never had so much mistrust placed in me. I was never lied to this much for something so simple as coffee, salads, and sandwiches. My faith in people, in friends, was shattered...I lost friends, I gained friends, it was the most trying year of work that I ever had. I have never been hurt so bad and I will never get hurt like that again.

In fact I will never do it again.

Bleak Outlook

2009-01-08T11:57:00.000-08:00

So I'm just sitting at the Cafe waiting for Sam to get done with his new job at 4:30. We drove together this morning (as Sam pointed out, it was the first time that we ever have been able to drive to work together) to save on some gas and because the roads were pretty horrendous that we didn't want to venture 2 cars out there.

We turned onto the side road about 1/10ths of a mile from our house and Sam ran over a black lid to a trash can. I think that our car has a decent amount of clearance under it but that darn lid stuck under the car and we started dragging it. It was so loud! Sam stopped and tried to back up to lose it and it still stayed with us. So we had to pull into a driveway and somehow the gravel in the driveway loosened the lid and it popped out from under our car. It was like a mini snowplow under our car. Goofy, but at least we had a good laugh on the way to work.

I am so glad that we are starting to see some longer days. I think that this winter has snuck up some depression in me that started silently but has recently reared its ugly head. Seasonal Affective Disorder, maybe I need to get some spotlight and sit in it, drink some milk for vitamin D and soak in some rays of artificial light.

We got to go to Hocking Hills right after the new year with some of our best friends. I really had a good time, but it went entirely too fast and it stayed busy the entire time also. I was expecting a little down time, but I didn't find it till about 1am every night, when everyone was trying to stay awake. I loved the Lodge we stayed in this year, it was beautiful and the lay out of the huge cathedral living room/dining room/kitchen was just about perfect to spend our time with each other. We ended up getting into some closets that were closed to our viewing:) and we found some amazing white graduation gowns and prom dresses. From there we made our own fun. As always good friends, good food, good hiking, good sleeping, good dancing. Pictures will be posted soon I hope!

Random thoughts, but thats how I do.

Reminiscing...

2008-12-16T18:43:00.000-08:00

Do you remember the first concert you ever went to of your favorite band? I was looking thru things of mine the other day...and I found some ticket stubs from Pearl Jam concerts I have gone to in the past. I remember my first time seeing them. We were in Pittsburgh at Post Gazette Gazebo on the lawn, I'm not even sure of the year? Maybe 1999? I'm sure Sam would remember the exact date since he is good with those things. We were waiting for Iggy Pop to come on the stage and play. A single man comes on the stage and says " I am Iggy Pop" and starts singing this:

I will come to you in the daytime
I will raise you from your sleep
I will kiss you in four places
As I go runnin' down your street

I will squeeze the life right out of you
I will make you laugh, I'll make you cry
And we may never forget it
As I make you call my name as I shout it to the blue, summer sky

And we may never meet again
So shed your skin lets get started
And you will throw your arms around me

I will come to you at nighttime
I will climb into your bed
I will kiss you in 155 places
As I go runnin' round in your head

I will squeeze the life right out of you
I will make you laugh, I'll make you cry
And we may never forget it
As I make you call my name as I shout it to the blue, summer sky

And we may never meet again
So shed your skin lets get started
And you will throw your arms around me...
("Throw Your Arms Around Me", Hunters and Collectors)

As he starts singing I realize that it is Eddie Vedder, the lead singer from Pearl Jam. All the years of waiting to finally see him live and in person wash over me and I remember the feelings. The song, the moment, it all fit together perfectly. All of the other Pearl Jam concerts that we went to, he never did that. He never came on stage and played an acoustic song to start the night like that night. It was one of a kind. I thought I was going to cry, I thought I was going to faint like one of those silly girls you see in the old Beatles videos. The crowd went wild as everyone realized it was Eddie all at the same time and that made the emotions even headier. But I will never forget how special that moment was. All the other concerts I have ever been to, none of them were as memorable as that one, and that moment.

Man Down!

2008-09-15T18:59:00.000-07:00

We took a hard hit from Hurricane Ike last night. Of course being on top of a hill we always get the most extreme elements of each season. We have had some pretty wild storms on that hill. The straight line winds that come over the hill have torn down trees and knocked down our tall garden sunflowers and blown away trash cans galore. In the spring we don't get leaves on our trees for another 2 weeks after everyone else because of the elements. Its just something that we are used to laugh at anymore.

Last nights storm was in the top 3 of the worst we have had since we moved there almost 10 years ago. We had Megan over for supper and planned on watching a movie or just chilling for the night. The winds were wild the entire day & they picked up around 8pm. We sat on the porch for awhile watching everything unfold; it's always a great show out there. Winds picked up and the electricity went out. We went inside for a moment and we noticed that cars were stopped on the road in front of our house. A large locust tree fell onto the road and was blocking it for traffic. People were trying to move the branches onto the side and into our yard so Sam went out with the chainsaw to try and cut it smaller. When we got out towards the road we noticed that the electric pole was bent at an angle towards the ground and leaning into our yard. Yikes! I called 911 to let them know the situation and of course it was busy. I finally got ahold of them and they said they would put it on file, to call if it caught on fire or sparked. Whoa whoa wee whoa!

Megan drove her car to the end of the driveway to shine lights on the tree in the road. It was so huge there was no way of it getting cut. While I was out there I got smacked in the ear with a flying branch and it hurt for the rest of the night. A huge branch rolled right into Megans car and scraped along the side of it while she was parked there. We watched it rolling towards us and Megan said that it came at her so fast she forgot to roll up her window as it rolled past the drivers side. Today we looked and her car is all scraped up from it. Electricity is still out now over 24 hours later and not supposed to get turned on possibly for a couple days.

I had to work today, but Sam took the day off to clean up everything. I went home and our great friends Megan and Jonathan were there. I worked the morning with Brad and he came over as soon as we got off work. We picked up and burned 5 truckloads of branches and leaves in the firepit in the afternoon, the yard probably looks better than it did before! We emptied the refrigerator and freezers and brought everything over to Jonathans house to store there. Tonight we are staying with the Wilsons since we possibly won't get electricity for another couple days, at least not till that electric pole gets fixed. But at least I got a shower tonight and I am comfy in a house with great friends who are hospitable and love to help us out.

What? Its all over?

2008-08-27T10:01:00.001-07:00

Playing cards on July 4th

Relaxin at Lakeside

Sammys birthday presents

Well, the summer is officially over for me. I'm not even sure what to write about because I didn't let anyone in on what was going on in my blogsphere at all. I've never been good at writing in journals because I just get on these crazy tangents and the information I wanted to write never gets on the paper. In saying all of that because I just went on a tangent; I had a really great summer! I got to relax, enjoy time with friends and family, go on some sweet weekend trips, drink myself a little too much, sleep in, get sunburnt, get mad, get tattooed, get a dreadlock, eat tasty smorgasbords, throw crap away, play some tennis, make a pinata, read a book, and all things good. I will write on some of the more memorable events of the summer in the future but for now, of course, I have to get to class.

Visiting

2008-06-10T09:11:00.000-07:00

I have been a world traveler these past couple months. Really just a Eastern part of the United States traveler is all. I went to Bradenton Beach in Florida with my Dad at the end of March and then at the end of April I went to Chicago for a NRA food show with Don, the owner of the Encore Cafe and Main Street Theater. Both trips were semi-work trips. I went to Florida to help Dad clear out and clean the house that was passed to him in the death of his brother. I went to Chicago to peruse a HUGE food show there to get some great ideas and make some contacts with restaurant sources. I did get time by myself which was absolutely amazing. I love to have time to myself and in both trips I had lots of it because I didn't have my husband or any friends travel along with me. I would rather have had Sam or close friends with me because each of the trips would have been so much more fun, but at the same time I enjoyed myself immensely in the fact that I was alone. I love friends and sharing all my time with others. Don't get me wrong. But I think that I am a loner more than I admit. I am too independent and I am stubborn as all get out. When I want something I want it then and there and that is a downfall of mine. I have a hard time waiting for things so it is just sometimes easier to do it on my own and in the timely manner that I want it done in. So it was nice to be by myself each time for awhile.

In Chicago I stayed in my own room at the Chicago Hilton on Michigan St. right across from the lake and Grant Park. This hotel reminded me of the movie "The Shining". I love that movie and I was just a little creeped out by all of the gaudiness and pomp at the hotel although it was absolutely amazing to see how much work and effort was put into that hotel. I was very much impressed by it all. I went to an awesome suburb of Chicago called Wicker Park where I visited a sweet record store, a musty bookstore and a independent coffeeshop called the Earwax Cafe. I want to take everyone back to visit them all with me again! In Florida I spent as much time on the beach as I could. I got my usual big ole sunburn which turned to a nice shade of pink on my skin and is now faded to barely noticeable. Overall they were both excellent trips and I hope to go back to both places soon and with family and friends so I can share more memories with them there.

Wheres the time gone?

2008-06-03T09:13:00.000-07:00

Whoa whoa we whoa! I thought that I would have a little more time to get in some more blogging and catching up on my blog reading once school was out. Turns out I don't have much extra of that glorious commodity to go around. I'm still pretty busy at the Cafe. I work 6 days a week there. Sundays are amazing I must say!!!! Last Sunday Sam and I spent the first part of the day outside. Sam played in the garden and did a bunch of other stuff around the house that needed done. Trimmed the golden threads by the door, rounded up all the weeds around the firepit and other areas of the yard and a bunch of other stuff I probably missed. I spent some time inside cleaning and putting away stuff that I just sat down whenever I got in the house the past several days. Later in the day we watched TV and both took a nice sunday nap in the living room. Sam in his lazyboy chair and me in my comfy, sink-in 1960's orange fainting couch that my best friends parents gave to me after I begged them to give it to me for years and years prior. This couch is the best thing in the world. I'm telling you if you ever get to sit or rest in it you will sink in and never want to come back out. It's that good. So off of that tangent; we got up went to hike in the Coke Ovens in Leetonia for awhile, got some Dairy Queen and sat outside by the little creek that runs behind it to eat and then went to the Oakvale Cemetary to walk around and check out some of the gravestones and mausoleums. Sam actually broke into one of the mausoleums. It didn't seem like it was really locked but once the doors were opened we could tell that it was supposed to hold back people from getting in. The entire inside was a rose colored marble and there were some keys laying on a bench that looked like they were to be used to get into the vaults. I don't know. We didn't try them. So after that adventure we went home and I made the usual Sunday homemade pizza. Which hasn't been "usual" for the last 2 months probably. Kyle and Brad came over and we watched a movie together and ate the tasty pizza. I must say the crust was really good this time. Thin and a little crunchy. Yum. I made a pepperoni, a spinach alfredo and a pepperoni and onion pizza. With the 4 of us we had less than 1 pizza left so it must have tasted ok. After the movie we watched the Best of Chris Farley DVD from SNL and laughed our heads off. I really miss that guy. He was probably my favorite from SNL. So good. Well, I am writing this at work so I must be getting back. I'm suprised that no one has come in to say that I had a visitor of phone call to get to. Later all!

Oh Man! Here it Comes!

2008-04-29T20:02:00.001-07:00

I'm not sure why I put the crazy pictures on my blogs sometimes that don't really make sense with the topic at hand. I enjoy a nice random picture to spice it up a bit and make you wonder what's in my wacko head. But this one seemed to make sense to me with all of the chaos coming up. So this next week is gonna be killer! 2 cumulative finals in the hardest classes I have taken as of yet in my entire college career, the grand opening of the Main Street Theater on May 8th and with that planning a menu for the big day, menu planning for Mothers Day, scheduling my employees around the Cafe and Theater, studying my brains out in the "spare" time I will have with all of that and then all of the little details that go along with getting a 440 seat theater prepared for a huge influx of people that have been curious for over a year to see the place in all it's glory! Yikes! I was talking to my friend and we are both sick of school so we discussed it and I think that we are going to just move to Mexico and start a freak show with some of the crazy people that come into the cafe every once in awhile. We got T-Rex, the Determinator, Creepy 40-100 year old woman, the Caramel Macchiatti man, Grand Wizard I and II, Pink Slipper Woman, and Red Dog. Wouldn't you like to come see it? So if you aren't doing anything this Thursday, May 8th we are having an open house for the grand opening of the Main Street Theater from 6-9pm. Refreshments, a movie(Breakfast at Tiffany's), presentation with a slide show and lots of other suprises to pique your interest. Come on out! I'd love to see ya!

Florida.

2008-04-20T18:08:00.000-07:00

So, um, yeah, I am in Florida right now. No joke. At this very moment I am sitting in the downstairs apartment of my Fathers newly aquired house. We have the windows all open and the fans going. Dad is sitting near me reading the local newpapers with his feet up just like any good old dad does in the evenings. I am sitting here in the other lazyboy chair with my feet up too. I am feeling pretty cold right now, mostly from the sunburn that I got while on the beach today for 2 hours. I swear I put on suntan lotion; that stuff just doesn't work for me and now I am freezing from all of the heat radiating from me. No wonder Florida is so hot. All the heat that people generate from sunburns here, its gotta be redunkulous. I kinda really like the feeling that a good hard sunburn gives you. A little headache, some tight skin on your face when you smile, all that good stuff. We are down here to clean up the house and to get together documents and stuff that my Dad needs to go through to clear up all the legal mumbo jumbo since his brother died. We flew down on Saturday morning and we are flying back on Tuesday. I am really enjoying the feeling of being down here. I enjoy alone time and this is also giving me some time to study and get schoolwork done without all the interruptions that life gives me in Ohio. So if you don't see me for a few days, well um yeah, thats cause I'm in FLORIDA!

Well that happened.

2008-03-26T11:17:00.000-07:00

Thanks to everyone who has had me in their thoughts and prayers these past few weeks. I am really doing well. This past week I was on spring break and also able to go to Hocking Hills with some of my closest and bestest friends for a few days. We all had a great time, I enjoyed the relaxation of it all and that really was what I needed the most. I didn't go into it with any expectations other than to get alot of naps. Well I did that, mos def, I think I had 7 naps in the sunday evening thru wednesday morning that we were there. Good times I tell you! The best parts of the trip were all the good eatings. Oh man, we always eat so good, I think that I probably gained 5 lbs while there, blue stilton hamburgers, homemade pizza with dough kneaded by my two hands, & amazing omelets for breakfast. YUM! I got to slide down a set of totally iced up stairs in Old Mans Cave and scrape up my hands trying to slow myself down. I took off my shirt and layed out on the warm rocks at the rim of Upper Falls, a little awkward for everyone, but I think we all know they liked it;) It was all memorable and, as always, amazing to go yet another year and enjoy the beauty and slow pace of it all.

Don't read this, it's just my rantings...

2008-03-10T10:41:00.000-07:00

So I have a few minutes to sit and blog after about a month of nonstop action. Actually I really need to just sit and write, I really don't have the time right now but this nagging feeling that I haven't put anything down in writing won't pass until I write something down. In my head if I can check off of the list just one more thing it brings down the stress meter. Know what I mean? So anyways, things are difficult in my life right now. I'm not trying to get any sympathy or "OH, I feel so bad for Laura" quotes, I have a great husband and awesome friends & family who have been so supportive of me thru everything going on that I couldn't ask for more. But there is only so much others can do for you, you have to figure the rest out on your own. Thru all that I am still pretty messed up. I told Sam that I am beyond the point of crying, and I never actually got to that part, I just kinda skipped it. Life is hard right now. I've wondered where the boiling point is and I think that I might just hit it soon if I don't change something. I'm not sleeping enough or eating enough. I'm not hungry, I actually feel sick to my stomach most of the time. I failed an exam in Pharmacology last week, I was sick and I missed a huge day of classes and I need to make them up. I don't care about getting motivated to even study when I should be 100% of the time when I am not at work. I do study but it doesn't sink in. I talked to my nursing professor and she said that she is scared for me, she can tell that I am not "focusing" as she put it. She could tell that my mind is racing in 100 different directions at the same time and I can't pin down any thoughts for long to really grasp them. I take pride in my multi-tasking abilities and I hate my deficient delegating skills cause they really suck. I am working on things getting easier at work, but I don't see the light at the end of the tunnel at school. I love the challenge still of keeping up this crazy schedule. I have had only 1 day off in more than a month. Spring break is next week and I need it, we are going to Hocking Hills. My Uncle Tom decided to kill himself on March 6th, which was his birthday, he thought that he took care of everything, but all he left was a big mess for my Dad to have to clean up and all I can think of is how I want to be there for Dad right now and help him thru this. Sorry, brain overload is a real killer. No one should ever try it.

Wow!

2008-02-21T13:36:00.000-08:00

Just wanted to let all my loyal fans know that I am still out there, alive and kicking! The Encore Cafe has been going really great. We have a steady traffic coming in every day. I see new faces and already some regulars who come in and it has been a joy to come to work everyday. I truly do enjoy myself, even though my feet and brain hurts at the end of the days I've been pulling. I had 65 hours in the first week and we were only open Thursday thru Saturday. I am still managing to get between 4-5 hours of sleep each night to at least keep me moving. "People think I'm crazy, but I'm not the only one..." (-John Lennon) Thanks to those who have been keeping me in their prayers and who have suprised me by their visits to the Cafe to refresh me and remind me why I am doing all this! Talk to you later!

Sofa-King Tired!

2008-01-25T10:35:00.000-08:00

Well I don't know if that title is very kosher but I put it there anyways, if you don't get it then don't think too much about it. OK? The ones that know the inside scoop on it may still think that I went a little over-board. But HEY, that's what you get when you are so tired and your thoughts aren't running too straight. Gosh, I had to respell "straight" like 8 times there. Yikes! Anywho...I really hate this time of year when it is just Sofa-King Cold and Sofa-King Dark all the time that you don't get motivated to do anything. I could really go for a day in Florida on the beach right now to soak up some sun and warm my bones just for a little while. Maybe a little nap and wake up looking like a burnt lobster. I'd take that over the blah that we have here in Ohio. I could go for some sun and heat right now and I am sure that I would have not nearly as big of a difficulty with everything as I do now. The 8am to 10pm day that I had at the cafe didn't help anything either. But that was so exciting to actually start training with real employees who are all nervous & excited at the same time.

Stuff

2008-01-22T14:05:00.000-08:00

Well I have to start writing a journal for one of my nursing classes this semester to help us get thru our thought cycles and to let stuff out that we wouldn't normally think about. I always have enjoyed journaling even if it takes up so much time. But it is true that you think about & retrospect over what has happened to you in days past. I think that is why I enjoy writing here too. I think of stuff that I wouldn't normally think about until my fingers start typing away at the keyboard. I never have a "draft" of words to bring with me, instead I just start writing as I go and it doesn't always come out clean and tidy but that's how my normal brain works anyways. I like to go back & read about how I was doing at a particular time or how I dealt with something in the past. It's all good. I think that I wrote more about the cafe than I did about this upcoming semester at college in my first journal entry. One thing pretty awesome, that I am so glad about, is that I switched my calendar year of the nursing program this past Friday & that means that I only have to finish 123 credit hours in the nursing program instead of the 129 that I thought that I would have to take. That's 2 less classes that I have to go thru & the best part is that I dropped my dreaded Physiological Chemistry class this semester & picked up another easier online class because P. Chem. is no longer required to take at all in the new calendar year that I switched to. HoOrAy! A-woo-hoo!

Morning Rituals

2008-01-20T06:41:00.000-08:00

I am sitting in the upstairs room of my parents-in-laws house listening to Sam working on putting new wheels on his fathers wheelchair, Sams mom is making some loud comments so that everyone can hear her voice just so it's heard. Sam is clanking away at taking the wheels off to put on the new ones. His Dad is doing his morning rituals while singing a gentle hymn and I am thinking of the usual, everyday things that families do to make their life normal. I remember when I was little that I would bumble out of bed in my usual pj's of a t-shirt and underoo's and go and sit under a blanket on the couch and watch some tv to get my day going. Maybe a little cereal or pancakes to really start the creative juices flowing as my brother and I postponed our homeschooling day as much as we could. We would get on the old Apple IIE and maybe play a little Oregon Trail or get out the Nintendo and finish up some Super Mario Bros II or go outside and spend the day in the woods pretending about something really great. The part that I don't even think I ever thought about back then, the part that I took for granted, is the air of taking it easy. Yes, we had stuff to do, but it never seemed to be overwhelming. We could take it easy and feel no pressure in life for all of the stuff that needed done. I love remembering that at one time in my life I felt like that. I so enjoy those rare times that show up when I feel that way all over again. I think that is why when those times do show up I enjoy them so much more, because I realize that I don't always have that time in the morning to sit at the couch in my pj's and watch some tv. I don't get the pancakes in the morning anymore like mom used to make them. I don't go outside or play some video games to jump start the morning anymore. That's ok with me, I would just really like to have a morning ritual that gave me at least a few moments of ease that I could get ready and enjoy the day that I have set before me.

Back to it

2008-01-12T18:40:00.000-08:00

Well things are back to normal around here. All our great friends that were home are all back to their usual routines in their parts of the world. I am interviewing and hiring employees for the cafe next week and I start back up at Kent on Monday. So I have to get back into the groove of working full time and going to school full time and get a good blend of the two without driving myself, my husband, or my friends crazy. That's all for now...

Good Times

2007-12-29T07:44:00.001-08:00

As much as the worries surrounding the uncertainty of a looming job future for my husband and the winter blahs that have hit Ohio pretty hard I still think that I am having one of the best times of my life right now. It's a great time mostly in part because everyone is home right now! Andrew and Lyndsay are home from Minneapolis, Evan is home from Bahrain, Kyle is home from Pittsburgh...we are just basking in the good times until everyone has to get back to the things that drive their everyday lives. I am in the cafe right now sitting at the new stainless steel tables waiting for applications and I'm thinking about when I left the house this morning. Sam was outside diligently preparing the wood supply for our house so that we can stay warm this winter. Evan came out to help and all I could hear was their dueling chainsaws outside. I am so glad that Sam has someone out there to help take the burden off of him in cutting and stacking all that wood and I am even more glad that Evan is actually in my front yard after being away for a whole year and he's sharing his time with my family. Right before I left to go to the cafe Evan was cutting down a big branch that is eventually going to come off the big sugar maple that we have in our front yard. He had to lift the chainsaw over his head to reach the branch and I watched the sawdust cover his whole head as it coated his bright red hair and in his eyes and all over his face. He put down the chainsaw to wipe out his eyes and the whole time he was smiling and laughing. I was so glad to see that! It's my hope that for all of us that are taking a little hiatus from the normal daily things that we do that it would be filled with fun and love and that it would re energize each and every one to bring us back to what we normally do with a new vision and energy and bring us all back together safely the next time around.

Drummers pt. 3

2007-12-10T15:41:00.000-08:00

Here are the rest of the drummers in my life. Hope you enjoy!

Chris-My Brother. He’s the 6’6” guy that seems so imposing that it only makes sense that he should play the drums. When he stands up it just scares people so it is good that he sits for this hobby. Chris and I are only 18 months apart in age and we have always had a really cool relationship. I hardly ever remember fighting, we have a lot in common and we have this weird connection that when I have a bad day I always find out that he had similar circumstances in his own. I don’t know if drums were his first choice of musical instrument. I think that he was kinda thrown into them. I think that the guitar is his first love, but I do know that he loves playing the drums. It seemed like overnight he knew how to play them and he was instantly good at it. Like most things in his life, skills come easily to him. Once he knows something he doesn’t forget it either. The way that he plays the drums sometimes cracks me up though. Sam and I used to make fun of the way that he would hold the drumsticks. Like he was ready to beat down and kill a man. You get the picture hopefully or maybe not. We don’t want Chris to look like a murderer or anything; nasty rumors get spread that way. He is totally a straightforward drummer, he is right on with his timing and he plays exactly what he needs to with no extra flourish and it always sounds good. I know that he had no formal training, I am pretty sure he is self taught with a little advice from a couple other drummers at the beginning. I really enjoy watching him play the drums, it is impressive and it makes me happy.

Brad. My Bud.-Well this guy has the skills to pay the bills! Brad has real talent when it comes to the drums (I'm not saying the others don’t)! I became friends with Brad about 5 years ago when Sam and I were youth leaders at the church he went to, now we are totally awesome friends and Sam and I have become really close to Brad and I consider him one of my best friends. I was able to be a part of the worship team at the church he played at. I’ve also seen him play at concerts with a couple bands he was a part of. Always impressive, it is amazing how quickly he can pick up a song too. I’ve seen songs thrown at him that he’s never heard and he picks up on them the first time playing. If you can believe it he actually looks like he is playing the drums about 90% of each day while he is awake. He drums on anything around and his feet are always moving. To be sure, if a song is playing he is beating his hands on his head or legs, it’s always makes me smile. I love to see him play the drums, he has a really awesome drum set that is this gorgeous light blue swirled color, he is very skilled at the drums and he does so many cool variations and he gets the arms flying and makes a cool show of it with no holds barred. Pretty sweet stuff.

Mike. My Incognito Friend.- Mike is another one of those extremely talented individuals that also plays the drums. I met Mike about 12 years ago when he was dating Sam’s neighbor Ginny and I was dating Sam. Mike and I are like 2 peas in a pod. He’s just a little wacky and so am I, so I really understand his mindset and the crazy stuff he does. As long as I have known him there has always been a drum kit set up in his house. He often fools around playing it and has taught himself how to play too. He really likes to jam and get together to play live music with others, it totally gives him nourishment and revives him. Mike is good at everything he does; I know the drums are no exception.
Kevin. My Old Friend.-Kevin is this wiry guy that is bred to play the drums. He is so fast paced and always on the go, it would be a shame if this world didn’t have Kevin playing the drums. We first met in high school and we don’t get to see each other as much as either of us would like anymore, maybe once or twice a year, but when we do it is always awesome to be hanging out again. I’ve seen him play at church and at concerts from high school to just a few years back and he sincerely loves the drums. They let out his emotion and high energy and they fit so well into his life. He sometimes needs to vent and I think that drums are his way of expressing who he is; they are just a natural extension of him.

Drummers pt. 2...Sam

2007-12-06T11:17:00.000-08:00

Of course the first drummer that I would write about would be my amazing husband Sam! I really have only heard Sam play the drums live one time. We were dating & he was making the decision to get out of playing the drums & he decided to take his set down and sell them. I had always wanted to hear him play & I told him that occasionally, kinda hinting that he should for me. He talked about how much he loved to play them & I wanted to see that part of his life at least once. Well one day he calls me over to his house & he brings me out to the garage & he says that he’s been practicing for hours on this song, its one of his favorite ones to play the drums to & he is going to play one last song for me before he retires the old drum set. I was & still am amazingly impressed that he would go thru all the trouble of doing this for me! I don’t even remember what song it was. He turned on the old cassette tape & blasted away at this baby! Something metal and loud, but it wasn’t the song that I remember. It was Sam playing something that he loved & put time and skill into, something that he wanted to share with me one last time. That moment made me love him so much for sharing a part of his life that was over, but he wanted to give me a glimpse of all the joy he had in it before he was done. To this day he has never played the drums again to a complete song that I know of. Yeah, he may fool around & hit a symbol or snare here and there (that rhymed). But everyone that asks him if he still plays drums he will say that he doesn’t do that anymore & that he has no interest in starting again. I’m not sure why he doesn’t want to give it a try, he actually has most of a drum set in our bedroom that is not set up. I don’t know if it will ever be again, or if it does when he will even sit behind it and play it. I may never see it again, but maybe he will sneak one of the old metal songs when no one is around & get that same exhilaration all over for something that he loves so much!

Drummers

2007-12-04T13:40:00.000-08:00

I was just thinking about it the other day and I came to the conclusion that the most important and influential men in my life are drummers. They may deny that they are "true" drummers, but at heart they will always have that love for the instrument in them. I’m not sure why it is so important that they all play drums, or why in this weird way I have been linked to them. I love the intertwining of interests that they all share and I am so glad to be a part of it. I just thought that I would share my heart and the importance these men play in my life and how much they mean to me.
I love the drums, and I always have. The thing that draws my attention in music is the singing first and then always the drums. I wish that I could play the drums, but I know that I would get my feet and my hands all tangled in some non-coherent sounds and I would never be able to make any sort of effort of decent noise out of them. They scare me to play. I have sat behind a drum set and they are daunting. I can sit in front of a piano or other instrument and I have no problem making a fool of myself playing it. But those darn drums frankly just scare the crap out of me. I think that it is the fact that whether you are good or not they are going to always be LOUD. If you do some really sour things on it, everyone will hear you, I guess that I don’t like people to hear every little mistake that I make. That’s just my nature. I wish that it didn’t matter to me but it does.
I thought that I would share these drummer men in my life because, like I said before, they play huge roles in my life and I love the fact that they have something so awesome in common, yet they are so different in each of their styles. So for now I will stop and gather my thoughts....check back soon!